Zakayo admits he used to drink a lot and beat his wife whenever he would find an excuse of something he was expecting her to do and she hadn’t done. “I would expect her to wash my clothes for example and if she had not done it that would make me beat her”, he says.

THE CHANGE

But all that was to take a complete turn for the better when Zakayo participated in training through Oxfam’s We-Care initiative. Zakayo says he is now a totally transformed man, taking up the responsibility of doing chores at home as part of his daily routine. He stopped drinking and started farming with his wife and planning for the family together.

He says: “I started doing chores after the training and with practice I got better at them. After the training, I would return home and try to put into practice whatever we had been taught. Gradually I started thinking it could be beneficial to my home and that’s how it has turned out. While my wife is doing some of the chores, I help by doing some others which makes us accomplish much more within a shorter time thus freeing us to do other things that are economically beneficial. I have seen a real change in our house.”

The training has changed Florence’s own beliefs as well: “Initially before the training, whenever I saw Zakayo washing his own clothes, I would get offended thinking he was taking up my role. It would make me feel like I had failed him as a wife. I would think it was his way of showing disrespect to me as a woman.”

“These days, we fetch firewood with my husband. It is about a kilometer away. We do most of the work together. This didn’t use to be the case. Before I used to fetch all the jerricans with water that we use as a family, all 8 of them, by myself. Our children also help with fetching water now and firewood and dishes and harvest sweet potatoes. Now that the workload in the house has been significantly reduced, I can also trade in baking and selling half cakes. And we go to bed earlier.”

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